I usually carried their bullets. They would make me lie down on the ground during operations, but I just held the bullets.
When they wanted me to kill the first man, my body was shaking and I fell down on the ground. They forced me to get up and watch as they killed the second person. At that point, I was thinking I should grab a gun from the insurgents and kill myself since they had taught us how to shoot.
When I thought that I’d be forced into marriage, I pretended to have stomach pains. They were concerned that I might be HIV positive, so they told me to go get tested at a hospital.
That’s how I escaped from the camp.
When I returned home from the camp, people would tell me not to dwell on my experiences. My dreams are filled with regret for renouncing my religion instead of enduring the abuse of the insurgents. Even when I’m awake, I’m upset about the situation.
Narrative provided by Human Rights Watch
